Category Archives: Skills

My five tips on how to handle a conversational bully

1. Keep yourself focused on your priority. When talking to a conversational bully (someone who behaves like a bully during conversations you have with her/him) it is easy to focus on the hurt the bulling inflicts or the anger the bulling triggers; but before becoming sucked up in these emotions asks yourself what is the …

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Understanding Attachment Part I

1. Attachment is an innate process by which a new-born enhances his or her chances of survival by responding to any threat or insecurity by seeking out, monitoring the behaviors of and aiming to maintain closeness to his or her protective caregiver (called the attachment figure, aka Mom or Dad). 2. You can observe this …

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5 Tips on Being Heard

1. Get the other person’s attention. Before you start speaking ensure that the other person knows you want her/his attention. Simply starting to talk is a highly ineffective way of getting someone to be attentive. An easy way of getting someone’s attention is saying her/his name and waiting for a reply. 2. Once you have …

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5 Tips on Building a New Habit

1. Be specific and clear. What is the exact habit/behavior that you want to incorporate into your life? Specific habits/behaviors that are clearly defined are much easier to add to your life. For example, wanting to increase your level of health is well and good but it is a rather vague idea, while wanting to …

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To Cope with Comparisons

1. If comparing your situation to other situations (or people) that are worse, harder, more difficult, etc… leads to increased gratitude or appreciation then this is a healthy, beneficial mode of comparison. 2. If however, this comparison is being used to minimize the difficulties, hardship, or pain of your situation then this is not a …

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My 5 Tips on Romantic Love

These tips are based on the assumption that you are in an emotionally healthy and abuse free relationship. If your relationship is not healthy or has abusive elements, I encourage you to reach out to a professional for guidance in navigating your relationship. 1. Know that the passion, intensity, zest and absolute sheer awesomeness of …

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My 5 Tips on Romantic Love

These tips are based on the assumption that you are in an emotionally healthy and abuse free relationship. If your relationship is not healthy or has abusive elements, I encourage you to reach out to a professional for guidance in navigating your relationship. 1. Know that the passion, intensity, zest and absolute sheer awesomeness of …

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5 Tips on Managing Time

1. How accurate is your internal sense of time? Some people have an accurate internal clock, allowing them to easily track the passing of time; while others have an internal clock that runs either fast or slow; while still others fall somewhere in-between. Knowing how your internal clock runs, allows you to determine just how …

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My five tips for treating yourself in a more loving way

1. Warmth & Limits – Ideal parenting is a combination of high warmth and high guidance, limits, boundaries…. Even though you are an adult that does not mean that this combination of warmth and limits is not necessary. Developing a more loving relationship with yourself can start by assessing if you have a tendency to …

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My five tips on being in motion

1. Throw out the word ‘exercise’. The word exercise is one loaded term – it implies that work, pain, sweat as well as tears must be involved and for many exercise is intertwined with issues around weight, value, body image, self esteem, failure, lost success, food, etc…. 2. Adopt the word ‘motion’. Rather than trying …

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